You did it – you’re in business.
Everyone still hates Azealia Banks, it’s been confirmed. Azealia Banks has recently taken to Twitter to launch a racist and homophobic attack on Zayn Malik. Despite attempting to apologise for her actions, it appears the general public still think she’s a knob. “She is just a bit of a twat really isn’t she?” says Matt…
An HR Administrator has decided to change her Job Title to “HR “working together” Leader, it has emerged. Felicity Jobsworth, based in Farringdon, Hampshire, has been employed in the HR team of a construction company for the past 2 years. “At first, I was employed as an HR Administrator, which completely made sense. However, since…
A man has apologised to his friends for being late, for the third time in as many days. Matt Clark, Birmingham, regularly turns up late to the annoyance of his friends. “The truth is, I always apologise but I really couldn’t give a shit” he says. “My time is extremely valuable and and I’d rather…
David Cameron has failed to negotiate an improved phone contract, it has emerged. Despite “hardballing” EE over his contract, negotiations have been unsuccessful. “I really wanted an upgrade on my Nokia 3210, as to be honest it isn’t really working for me any more. I called up EE and told them that I wanted the…
“Working from home” increases dramatically on Fridays, research suggests. Businesses everywhere have noted a significant decrease in office-based employees on Fridays. “I find that I can work more productively from home” states Matt Clark, Marketing Executive, Walthamstow. “The office environment raises many distractions and I really need to meet this deadline.” “That, and it is…
